Part IV of Wolverette #2’s issue: LAURA MÉRITT INTERVIEW

Posted: September 27, 2009 in Past issues

INTERVIEW WITH LAURA MÉRITT

I gladly present an interview with Laura Méritt, a well known person to the Berlin Sex Scene: sex worker, operator of „sexclusivitaeten“, sex-counselor, mediator and communication scientist. Make also sure to check out her homepage which is just as interesting as the person herself. Here’s Laura:

1. What is your motivation to explore the world of sex, female sexuality and lust in general? How did these issues become such an important focus in your life and work?

25 years ago I was – like many women – interested in exploring my body, sensuality, sexuality, gender affairs, relationships. As I got involved in feminist things and was studying communications, feminist linguistics; I did not only analyze verbal but also nonverbal communication. I came to the decision that I have to go to foreign countries and disciplines to study body politics because I did not find serious teachers nor sex academies for practical lessons in Germany. The Osho community was not for me: I did not want to follow a patriarch. So I joined the whores movement and learned how to deal with sexuality, transsexual performances, role playing and – very important – also learned communication about sex. Who could tell and teach me better then whores?

2.Female sexuality still seems a mystery; partly because of still existing clichés and norms, partly because society seems to prefer the depths of female sexuality being kept a “secret”. What do you think might be the reason that still so many women don’t dare to explore their sexuality but turn to stereotype advice/behaviour when it comes to sex?

Clichés and norms about who is sexy and how sex has to be, what is the right orgasm or what an orgasm is, parallel with the dual thinking of male-female has a long long long tradition, as long as dicks grow thru telling everybody. So it takes more then 30 years of feminist movement to change this patriarchal thinking and internalisation, but on the other side, only 30 years let to a big change in dealing with sexuality and especially with the male heterosexual norm! Today we have a selfconscious female sexuality, more then ever before.
3. When it comes to porn, most women don’t really feel attracted to the mainstream productions – for understandable reasons. Could you name a few essential things of which you think they should definately be considered when  porn should be enjoyable for women?

The most important thing is a professional camera, looking for interesting pictures, with an interesting light setting. The genital focus is not the dominant one, and also penetration is not the only thing in sexworld, but variation, variation, variation. The persons can do some professional acting, too, they are able to show emotions during the sexplay. This means not that female porn is full of  romance and feelings but feelings can be a  “normal” part as crying for the orgasm while looking in the camera. The actors can also be older or look in another way beautiful then the blondiebigtittsgirls and blackdickhunters.

4. Most porn shops are mainly directed at men. Yours isn’t. What are the differences?

Women sexshops have better quality, because we changed the norms in toyworld. We introduced colours and ergonomics for women. We deal with transparence, we talk in a warm and cosy atmosphere about sex and give competent advice and informations. That´s what is really revolutionary. Moreover in my sexclusive salon there is a creative pool for erotic books and art projects, we organize sexparties and workshops for women, transgender, bi and queer folk, where people talk with each another and everybody can learn to develop sexuality/ies.

5. Are there any exciting projects you are working on right now that you wanna tell us about?

Yeah, we produced a feminist porn, which has still to be cut. I am very excited about this. And then, I am developing “trans-tantra” now, where gender is no question anymore. I am very happy to welcome all kind of genders in my workshops, it is such an enrichment! And last but not least, I am wokring on sex and laughter, there will be a book in the near future and workshops, too.

6. Is there any general advice you would like to give to female readers when it comes to their (female) sexuality?

Go to sexplore and dare to talk about it. Use your voice, your breath and move, babe! Don´t force or let pressure reign.

7. Anything you would like to add?

Slow down and pleasure up! Seeya in my salon.

www.sexclusivitaeten.de

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