Part II of Wolverette #2’s Print issue: “WILD & UNTAMED”

Posted: September 27, 2009 in Past issues

Wild and Untamed

Sex. The almost mythological figure. Our image of it gets shaped by porn, teen magazines, novels and opinions from our peers (or even parents) before we make sexual experiences ourselves.

This image is kinda weird, especially if we look at the female part of it. They follow a certain code that I mentioned earlier: the image that gets planted in our brains are images of neat, shaved and groomed girls willing to have sexual relationships in a reliant form.

Cause there are rules. Nevermind if we look at or think of the kinky bondage stripper or the cute girl on the illustrations of a sex column in a teen mag  or most artsy photos. If you ask me, they have all one thing in common: they are tamed. Their sexuality is tamed. Because they fit in certain norms like listed above.

It is hard to explain what I mean by „tamed“ specifically. But I will try with a few examples, perhaps it will get clearer (at least I hope so).

Maybe you have noticed the vintage nude photos from the very early 20th century that are spread across this zine. I like these pictures a lot, that’s why I decided to put them in here. What I like about them is not particulary the „exotic retro“ style. I like that the girls in them seem to be an active part of the photograph instead of a pure motive. They look like they have something to tell – more to tell than  the bedtime stories and cliché fantasies the eyes of a playboy model tell you. Not only do those vintage women have all sorts and shapes of bodies, also their presentation is various: they are shy, seductive, bored, curious… but they seem to have their very own idea of what their sexuality means to them. Much more inspiration than nowaday’s nude photos offer. These girls are not tamed, they don’t seem to only serve the common idea of „this is what men like so look this and that way when you pose“. Just for fun, look at some playboy shots and ask yourself what the women there might have to tell you and wether it is nearly as interesting as the girls I was talking about. Do they display their very own sexuality? Or are they just a canvas for the (male) photographer’s wishes? Does he use his model for the picture or does he honour her by taking it? Or simply: what does the picture tell us? What is the pic supposed to tell us?

Another example: the new trend of pussy beauty standards. There are very crass forms like surgery. Surgery to make your pussy standard and a „beauty“. For example shortening the inner labia so that it doesn’t hang out anymore. Or reshapening your external genital structures so that they are even. Sounds sexy, huh? Or just the feeling that your pussy is ugly if it isn’t partly or completely shaved, if it’s too hairy and not trimmed enough. A girl who had a vaginal cosmetic surgery is quoted by womensenews: „”I looked in like, those magazines, and saw that the inner labia shouldn’t stick out like mine did so I had a labiaplasty and now I love the way I look; nice and neat and new. My vagina looks perfect.”

I’m not going into depth how stupid it is to assume that there’s such a thing as a „perfect vagina“ or that the inner labia „shouldn’t stick out“. What I wanna point out are the words she is describing her new pussy with cause they pretty much nail down what I wanna talk about here: she says her genitals now look nice and neat. As she was wishing for. But why?

Actually I was really irritated when I read those words. Nice and neat. Okay now – a vagina has certainly more meanings than just a sexual one – but you can’t deny that a vagina and sex have a lot to do with each other nevertheless. And maybe it’s just me but when I think of sex, I think of lust, joy, sensuality, desire, explosions. Of eye-winking eroticism, skin, sweat, voluptuous touches and a strong, wild feeling of blissful pleasure. You know, that kinda stuff. The words „nice“ and „neat“ would actually not come to my mind… Just imagine asking someone how their sex is and they answer „ Oh, it’s nice and neat“. Well… maybe I’m biased or something but if I want my sex rather unconstrained and fervid than neat, then why would I want my pussy to look like that? And I’m not talking about rampant orgies here. But better some passionate vanilla sex than… well, nice and neat. Why tame your pussy instead of letting it lead a fliberated, joyful pussy sex life? I’d rather want to picture my vagina as a free proud wolf than as a tamed, trimmed chihuahua (no offense to chihuahua lovers, but we’re talking about sex metaphors here…).

I don’t wanna say „don’t shave, it’s bad“ or „only have wild rough sex“ – that’s totally not the point. You can shave your pubic hair in an ace of spades’ shape if you wish or have sex using a checklist if that’s what satisfies you.

What I am talking about here are the lots and lots of weird subtle restrictions imposed on us, our sexuality and our genitals. Our bodies are wonderful and can bring us so much pleasure but we are taught to tame them, to tame our sexuality so that it fits into a certain pattern, a pattern that keeps us insecure and from fully enjoying and celebrating our sexuality. I’m not sure if I was able to sketch the full atmosphere of society’s stubborn (and too often successful) try to tame the female sexuality the way I wish I could.

I think it was Alice Schwarzer who once said something like „Nowadays women are very emancipated but as soon as you tell them they’re not desireable they fall back in the same old pattern of behaviour that keeps us from becoming equal.“

So it’s our turn to not let anybody tell us we’re not desireable – cause we are! Don’t let anybody tame or restrict your sexuality or pleasure. Restricting ourselves costs us a lot of nerves, energy, lust and fun – not good. So maybe it’s time we start thinking about what the things are that hold us down personally and reconsider wether they are as mighty as we thought, as powerful as we are told. Let’s reconquer our sexuality and be as wild and untamed as our very individual thoughts, soul and personality is.

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